Being Unpopular and Still Believing in Yourself

The other night while having dinner with a group of friends, a topic came up and i casually said, “Oh, i’ll have to post that on my blog,” to which a friend replied, “Your blog that no one ever reads?” Oooooo. When i told my roommate her response was, “what an ass!” I admit, at first i was hurt by the comment. It was like being told you’re fat. Or ugly. Or any number of things we don’t want to hear about ourselves. Yet i know what he said was true. I know it but don’t like to think about it, though the visitor counter stares me in the face every time i log on. To peel back one more layer, the real truth of the matter is not that people don’t read my blog. The truth is that i am not a popular person.


This kind of discovery is always hard on the old ego. But i don’t give ego a whole lotta leg room. Ego isn’t real. I tend to think of Ego like a character in a movie. An illusion within an illusion. Nonetheless, these little ego-pity events in life can add up faster than we can dispel them. And we tend to hoard negativity like squirrels hoard acorns. We stack them, stuff them, and bury them all around just in case there might be a shortage sometime in the near future.

Popularity vs. Likeability
In all honesty, i’ve never cared much for the idea of being popular, as is obvious by my personal life for anyone who knows me. I like Star Wars and Star Trek. I like to dress up as a pirate. I don’t watch TV and have never watched an episode of “Friends.” I don’t feel it necessary to be with someone all the time. I like mustard on my chicken sandwich. And on my French fries. I like getting up early and sipping hot tea. I’m not embarrassed to walk into an “adult shop” and make a purchase. I know all the words to “Somewhere Over the Rainbow…” So i’m unpopular. OK. But does being unpopular also mean – un-liked? Society tempts us to go down that road. Magazines, movies, talk-shows, and advertising all suggest we have to be popular to be liked, loved, and validated to be a worthy human being. Yet, popularity and likeability aren’t synonymous.

Real Belief
Does any of this matter? Being liked? Being popular? Not really. I am a writer and photographer whether anyone ever reads my words or buys my photos. It is my passion. It is what i love. It is part of who i am and what i do. It is not necessary for anyone else to believe in me because – i – am the one who has to believe.

“And the dreams that you dare to dream really do come true…”